I Wish…

Yesterday, a friend posted a picture of a bench sitting near the water, with the question “If you could spend time with anyone, who would it be?” I didn’t even have to think about it…

I wish I could spend time with my Grandma Evelyn.

It’s kind of odd…for the past couple of days I’ve actually been thinking about her. And as I write this, I’m just now realizing that this is the first time I’ve ever called her my grandma. She’s always been referred to as “my dad’s mom.”

You see, she died when my dad was just eleven years old. At the age of 28, she went to the hospital for a procedure that would be an out-patient appointment today, but died from complications. While my dad lived a wonderful life in so many ways, he never talked much about his life up to her death, so none of us did. I believe it was just too sad for him. And now, he has left this side of my life and I’m left with regrets of not asking him more about her. If there’s one thing that I wish for, more than anything…it’s that they sit together in eternity visiting every single day.

I’ve seen a couple of pictures of her….a very pretty women. The pictures were of her and my dad on a dock, sitting in the sunshine and, I believe, they were fishing.

I wish…I could sit and share our stories. She had my dad when she was just 17 years old; left high school in her junior year. Back in 1928, that must have been scandalous. I also became a young mom at the age of 17 and left high school in my junior year. Knowing how I was treated, I can only imagine what she must have gone through then. What a great encourager she would have been in my life.

I wish…I could play with her hair. Her picture shows her hair to be coarse and possibly wildly curly like mine. It hasn’t been easy growing up with my wild hair. I mean, no one has hair like it. But she probably would have encouraged me to be happy with my crazy curls, to just allow them to be wild and free, instead of fighting them all of my life.

I wish…we could talk about memories of the past and dreams of the future. I have stories that my great grandmother wrote (her mom, who I never met) and consider them such a treasure. I wonder if the passion of writing flowed through her has well.

I wish…I knew how much we have in common with one another. Was she quirky like me? Did she laugh at life the way I do and have a great passion for her family? I believe with all of my heart and soul that we would have been kindred spirits.

I have a granddaughter now. I just cherish our relationship. Sometimes when she’s just sitting in my lap and laughing at my silliness, she’ll stop and look at me…I mean, really look at me…as if she’s looking through my eyes and into the depths of my heart. Without hesitation, she’ll place her little hands on my cheeks, give me one of the most loving smiles, lean in to give me a kiss and then rest her head against my heart. I could hug her forever.

I wish…I could smile at my grandma, put my hands on her cheeks, kiss her pretty face and rest my head against her heart. I believe she would hug me forever.

So that’s the answer to that question…

I wish I could spend time with my Grandma Evelyn.

i wish - 2

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