You know, when I originally thought up this idea to blog, each day, in my pursuit of the “simple life,” I never really thought I’d be diving into so much internal cleaning. I mean, this all began when I did some real spring cleaning in my home. I can be very detail oriented when it comes to certain things (call it OCDish tendencies), so I thought this would be an awesome journey to take friends on with me. When I get into something, I will research it to death in my effort to become proficient. But like I said, I was thinking completely outward.
It’s interesting to me how writing/blogging causes you to go so much deeper into yourself. I’ve said it before in other notes, how I feel so much more in tune with everything going on around me now. In some ways it irritates me, but in others I find it very cool.
Irritating to me because I’ve always been a deep person anyway and I never thought I could get much deeper than I already am – nor did I really care to. I’m not the kind of person that likes to stick around and dissect every little thing in my life, especially the mishaps. I believe there are just some things we need to move beyond so they don’t take control and hold us down. But cool, because I just continue to learn more and more about myself…and just how deep my heart really goes. It’s helping me to sort out a few issues that maybe I’ve skipped over too quickly. In my writing, I’m finding therapy for my heart which encourages me to keep on keepin’ on.
I woke up feeling really snarky this morning…my head full of cobwebs. I’m not sure if it was from…lack of sleep due to my stiff neck and the swooshing sound of my heartbeat in my left ear (something that happens every now and then)…the need for coffee…or just because of other stuff that I felt annoyed with. Probably all of the above.
And this is, actually, my second attempt at writing today. I made the decision to wad up the first draft and toss it in the waste basket because it was filled [to the rim] with my random rants…the evil side of my random ramblings; just a mess of mental cobwebs, if you will. I justified my first run-through because I know that people want realness in what others write…it’s what draws us into each other’s lives. But it was really snarky; a bunch of venting to everyone out there about everything that discourages and annoys me. Feeling thankful I didn’t publish that.
Okay…it did feel good to get it out of my head and into written form where I could see it and deal with it, but the truth is…it’s just not my style of writing to put my rants out in the open for all eyes to see. Some things I feel the need to keep to myself.
But I’ll share this…just like anyone else, I experience days of chaos, shortcomings, and disappointment in people and things – and this morning was such a day. But I won’t take you down that road with me because my true desire is to encourage others and draw them in with words that lift and sooth the worn and weary heart.
It was my daily crossroad….the decision whether to take the road that was wide and windy or the road that was narrow and straight. I would much rather suck it up and take the road that will get me into a lot less trouble – and, in the long run, it’s definitely the simpler road to take.
My intent today was to tell you about my success with KP Duty…but it seems I had some cobwebs I needed to get out-of-the-way first. Amazing how a good decision can clear them away and bring cleanliness to something more important than my home…that is, my heart.
And by the way…I did complete my inventory last night. I was able to create a great menu with what I already have on hand, with just a small list of things to add to it. I can check that task off the list. Success!